Jonah Hex (2010)

Movie Info

Stick ’em up! I’m here to rob you of your life (at least 82 minutes)

Jonah Hex (Josh Brolin) has lost everything.  Turning on his fellow Confederate soldiers when ordered to burn down a hospital, Hex’s actions lead to the death of his best friend Jeb Turnbull (Jeffrey Dean Morgan).  Jeb’s father Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich) enacts revenge on Hex by killing his family and leaving him for dead.  Saved by the Native Americans, Hex was left with the ability to talk to the dead and bent on revenge.  Turnbull vows to bring down Ulysses S. Grant (Aidan Quinn) on the United States’ Centennial, and Grant enlists Hex to stop Turnbull.  Hex with a prostitute named Tallulah Black (Megan Fox) discover Turnbull has a weapon that could destroy Washington, D.C.

Smile Jonah…it’s the last time you can!

Directed by Jimmy Hayward, Jonah Hex was based on a DC Comic character.  The genre-bending Western(esque) film was poorly received and a notable bomb upon its release.  Megan Fox was nominated for a Razzie for Worst Actress and Brolin and Fox also received a Razzie nomination for Worst Screen Couple/Screen Ensemble for Hex’s face and Fox’s accent.

Jonah Hex is a mess…there is no way around it.  It was odd for DC who has been kind of tight on their characters to turn to Hex for a big screen picture.  Jonah Hex first appeared in All-Star Westerns #10 (March 1972) but the film altered Hex to make him super-human…he can raise the spirits of the dead to learn about who he’s hunting.  This kind of belittles the character, by making his abilities superhuman.

I new I should have gotten out when I saw you in Ghost Rider, Bentley!!!

Along with these changes, the story also just falls apart.  The movie jumps around for no apparent reason.  Hex is haunted by flashbacks which in a normal film would reveal the tale of what occurred to Hex’s family…but we already know that from the first scene.  The flashback serve no purpose but to pad the story which is only 82 minutes anyway.

It is too bad that a great cast (minus Megan Fox) is stuck in a bad movie.  I generally like Josh Brolin and love John Malkovich…both of which flounder here.  Other nice actors include Michael Shannon, Michael Fassbender, and Aidan Quinn in bigger roles…also for naught.  I do find it amusing to see Will Arnett in a “dramatic” role as Lieutenant Grass.  A couple of surprise actors include Wes Bentley who’s kept a low profile since American Beauty (with some problems) and Luke Duke himself Tom Wopat.  Megan Fox continues her string of poor acting in this film…at least she’s consistent.

Would you shut up about those stupid Transformers?!?

I rather like the recent Jonah Hex which keeps a bit of a more comic-book style in DC’s New 52 All-Star Western series and wish that DC had done a bit more work to make this more of the film’s style.  Instead, they tried for a weak half-ass attempted at steampunk which didn’t work visually or story wise.  I wish that the movie had just been a hyped up Desperado or The Quick and the Dead style Western.

Jonah Hex isn’t that much of a commitment.  It is less than an hour and a half so it is a quick watch…just don’t expect much from it.  Originally, the movie was planned for multiple sequels, but due to the poor showing, I don’t see Jonah Hex gracing the big-screen anytime soon (he has appeared in Arrowverse TV series), but in an age of remakes galore, who knows?

Related Links:

All-Star Western 1:  Guns and Gotham

All-Star Western 2:  War of Lords and Owls

All-Star Western 3:  The Black Diamond Probability

All-Star Western 4:  Gold Standard

All-Star Western 5:  Man Out of Time

All-Star Western 6:  End of the Trail