Dracula 3D (2012)

dracula 3d poster 2012 movie dario argento
2.0 Overall Score
Story: 2/10
Acting: 3/10
Visuals: 1/10

Rutger Hauer is kind of fun for a bit

Bad effects, bad adaptation, bad acting

Movie Info

Movie Name: Dracula 3D

Studio:  Multimedia Film Productions

Genre(s): Horror

Release Date(s):  May 19, 2012 (Cannes Film Festival)/October 4, 2013 (US)

MPAA Rating: Not Rated

dracula 3d rutger hauer van helsing

Good to see the professional vampire slayer still uses a couple of sticks for a cross

Evil has overtaken a small mountain town near the Carpathian Mountains.  People are dying of mysterious illness and everyone is living in fear.  When a young man named Jonathan Harker (Unax Ugalde) is hired to work for Count Dracula (Thomas Kretschmann), he finds himself trapped in the castle in a web of horror.  Dracula is a vampire and spreading his disease all over the countryside.  Harker’s wife Mina (Marta Gastini) finds her good friend Lucy (Asia Argento) seems to be suffering as well and when joined by a man named Dr. Van Helsing (Rutger Hauer), she’s about to discover that vampires aren’t myths and stories.

Directed by Dario Argento (who helped adapt the screenplay), Dracula 3D also goes by the name of Dario Argento’s Dracula.  The movie is an adaptation of Bram Stoker’s classic 1897 gothic horror novel and premiered at Cannes to negative reviews.

dracula 3d vampire impaled crucifix

See the problem is ma’am that you have a crucifix sticking out of your chest…

I love Argento and was looking forward to seeing him take on a big story like Dracula.  I never have cared for 3D and hoped that it wasn’t going to be distracted.  Not only was the 3D distracting, but Argento’s take on the story left a sour taste in my mouth.

The movie’s story is sloppy.  For a moment it feels like a straight (albeit weak) adaptation.  It then feels like a bit of a role reversal with Mina being the lead and her teaming with Van Helsing to rescue Jonathan.  It ends in a mess that feels neither original or worthy of the story or Argento’s talent.  It is like watching a college rendition of Dracula.

Part of the problem is the acting.  Thomas Kretschmann isn’t a compelling Dracula (he later went on to play Van Helsing in the 2013 BBC version of the story) and Unax Ugalde really struggles as Jonathan Harker (which has always been kind of a bland character).  Mina starts out slightly interesting as performed by Marta Gastini, but quickly loses interest.  It feels like Asia Argento is in the movie as a favor for her father, and Rutger Hauer’s late appearance makes it seem like he showed up, said “give me my check”, and took some crosses and stakes for his scenes.

dracula 3d preying mantis

A man who has made tons of scary movie has to realize this is laughable…

What is extremely appalling is the visuals.  Not only does the 3D result in random stuff coming toward the screen, but the money used to shoot it in 3D obviously was taken from the very cheap looking sets.  In addition to the bad sets, the computer animation looks one step above Birdemic…it is awful.

Dracula 3D is a horrible disappointment from the onset.  It took a couple attempts to watch it, and even though it is relatively short, it still was a challenge.  Some claim that it is meant to be cheesy and an homage to things like Hammer horror films…but it feels more like Andy Warhol’s Dracula (which I would watch before this anytime).  Pretty much any Dracula has more merit and “teeth” than this version…just skip it.

Author: JPRoscoe View all posts by
Follow me on Twitter @JPRoscoe76! Loves all things pop-culture especially if it has a bit of a counter-culture twist. Plays video games (basically from the start when a neighbor brought home an Atari 2600), comic loving (for almost 30 years), and a true critic of movies. Enjoys the art house but also isn't afraid to let in one or two popular movies at the same time.

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